The Starfighters: Will Zens

The advertising team for Will Zens' The Starfighters must hate children. I can think of no other reason why they would name a film consisting of almost nothing but Air Force stock footage The Starfighters. The film has no stars (figuratively and literally), drawn out scenes of jet fighters tediously refueling, and an abrasive lack space travel and/or starfighting. What it does have is a paper-thin, nearly non-existent plot about F-104 Starfighter pilots. But really, the word "plot" doesn't do The Starfighters justice. There is only a succession of boring, pointless moments of personal drama stitched together between stock footage. Unfortunately, none of this stock footage includes things like dogfights or actual combat. Instead we get shot after shot of Starfighters blowing up stationary targets on the ground in the desert. The film tries to inject a subplot about one of the pilots having a Senator for a father...but it doesn't go anywhere. It also tries to feature a love story revolving around another pilot. Shockingly, it also goes nowhere. That's the best way to describe The Starfighters, come to think of it. It goes nowhere, it does nothing, it stars nobody, and it wastes your time. Ladies and gentlemen, The Starfighters is the anti-movie. If you want to see a movie about figher pilots, just go watch Top Gun (1986) again.

2/10